_g r i p | i n t o x i c a t e d
I started this one a long time ago. And I'm glad it's finally done and I can move on. The impact of trauma / abusive relationships / manipulative behaviors on someone's life varies immensely. But for some people it just feels like it will never let go. Familiar patterns and shit. It just changes you forever. But yeah, you can fight it. Heal. We often hear that healing is not linear and it surely isn't for me. But I try to find the strength in myself to let it go, to put myself first. I would say that forgiving yourself and understanding your own worth is fundamental. Some people are garbage and it's not your fault if they treat other people like shit. You are not what happened to you or how they treated you, it doesn't define you. But, at least in my opinion/own experience, you have to accept that it is how it is, and refuse to let it wreck you. To let it eat you alive. It's so fucking hard but this journey is necessary. To "forgive" yourself for a fault that you didn't commit, because guilt and the belief that you're shit and you deserve what happened or happens to you is what brings you down, and how you keep following familiar patterns etc. Working on this takes time. But eventually you'll find out that you are hella strong. And nothing like shit. You will have shitty days and fall again and make mistakes but yeah, self-respect is something you can learn. And there are supportive and empathetic people in this world, too. That said, I can only speak for myself and your truth is what matters. We all have our own story, context, things to deal with and ways to do it. It's just way too complicated to just drop statements. I just wanted to share these thoughts, even if it was hard, because I hope it can help someone, somewhere. Because it helped me, and because it matters.
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#blackwork #ink #drawing #darkart #illustration #darkartist
